My neighbor jokingly made some comment the other day about my life being an open book. And honestly, I think the last couple of months, it has been-especially for those who live within a mile of me.
But I just realized that for all of you that read my blog and don't see me in real life, you may still think I am pregnant. Well I am not. (which I actually think is very few people right now, since my blog went private. I mean, quite a number of you COULD read my blog, but since it doesn't show up in the automatic feed saying that I have posted again, I don't think anyone realizes I have posted in the last 3 months. Ah well!)
I had a miscarriage at 12 weeks. When it happened, I was really sad. Not a very interesting word, but that's the best word I have to describe it. Even as I was going through it, though, I thought "I can do this. I am okay. Everything will be okay." But 6 weeks later, I hit a wall. I was back to crying every day and I thought "I can't do this!" I was about ready to ask to be released from one of my callings so that I could just de-stress my life even a little bit.
But I held on just to see if I could snap out of it. And that's what my post is to tell you. That I did, and I am in a good place right now. I feel better about my life right now than I have in a good long time. I have good friends and neighbors who are more wonderful than I could ever hope for. And a mom who came and helped me with some projects around the house that I couldn't seem to do. I love my sweet boys (all three of them!) and I am happy.
The Storied Life of A.J. Fikry
2 days ago